'River of Death'  (1989) - Steve Carver.

Never before was the sleekly exciting, panther paced, high adventuring, blockbusting literature of Alistair MacLean more deliriously distilled into high-octane celluloid than in the bullet-blasted, cannibal-defying, adrenalin-spiking, Amazon-jungle adventuring of Cannon Films explosively exhilarating, Teutonic tyrant thrashing, entertainingly old school, 80s B-Movie thrill-fest, ‘River of Death’! 

Dynamically directed with a barnstorming belligerence by groovy genre maverick, Steve 'Lone wolf McQuade' Carver, his rollicking deep river adventure is given an ample boost by the celluloid-melting performances of scorching-hot genre stalwarts: L.Q. Jones, Herbert Lom, Donald Pleasence, plus an evilly charismatic, Robert Vaughan, and pushing the alpha levels to the very limits of human plausibility is the incandescent, star-making performance of buff, heroically handsome ‘American Ninja’ icon, that swiftly karate chopping, bullyboy-blasting, steel-thewed, badass B-Movie dude, Michael Dudikoff himself! Righteously renewed on this pristine-looking 88 films Blu-ray edition, the future looks bright for this rewardingly rumbustious, Amazon-set, pirate-packed, non-stop 80s action bonanza from those legendarily opportunistic exploitation behemoths, Cannon Films! 

‘This sure ‘ain't no sleepy holiday cruise, you snooze on this river of blood, YOU LOSE!!!' - Tor Bronson - The Heroic Blood Shed. 

'Terminally tweaked German scientists, blood-mad pirates, carnage-crazed cannibals, major league machine gunning mayhem, and eternal VHS-hero, Michael Dudikoff, 'River of Death' is more than we sewer-dwelling skells deserve, dude!!!' -  Finneas Flange the Ferociously Fapping Fink.

'Dishy Dynamo, Dudikoff flushes the turd-reich down the Amazonian river!!!' - Philomena Fellatio / Salon Titty.