'The Nail Gun Massacre' (1985) - Bill Leslie & Terry Lofton.

With some classic horror movies sublime cinematic style and subtlety is absolutely essential, but this sordid little film's hammer blunt title suggests that you had better look elsewhere for artful nuance or deftly constructed analogy; as along with its perfectly disgusting dining partner, the no less higher wattage, taste-dodging gut-churner, 'The Microwave Massacre', maniacal directing duo, Bill Leslie & Terry Lofton winningly eschew a meaningful narrative for a bargain bin gruesome B-Movie bloodbath, pronounced power tool perfidy, and a savagely penetrating bit!

In many instances a horror fan requires nothing more taxing than the grisly repetition of a diabolically distempered misfit bloodily venting his profound psychological trauma upon a screamy team of dreamy, forest frugging teens; gorily dispatching them for no other reason than the fact so many of us get a rewardingly perverse kick out of watching 'em do it! And the quintessentially quipping, motorcycle helmet-clad madman nails this skeevey need every time! Happily, 'The Nail Gun Massacre' isn't so much plotless, as having uproariously lost the plot completely!!!!

This is the blood rare instance where the road to cinematic excess is righteously paved with gratuitous gore! Where quality acting would simply get in the way of all the righteously noisome slayings, and stylishly composed camerawork would look no less out-of-place in 'The Nail Gun Massacre' than a pristine pearl-white disco suit in a tumultuously busy slaughterhouse! Some splatter movies are just dumb and plumb ugly, but that still doesn't mean they can't be offally and disgustingly good! I think the slime has come to reappraise this notorious cut-price cult VHS screaming sickie and raise it from its relative obscurity to take its rightful disgrace upon the gloriously gruesome pantheon of video-rage, terror taped horror greats!

Some horror movies sort the men from the boys, 'The Nail Gun Massacre' simply doesn't care, it hates you all equally! And this ignoble, inanely disreputable, death-dealing disasterpiece proves that you don't need a refined creative talent to make a gnarly good splatter movie, you just need guts, and preferably, a whole steaming bucket of 'em!!!! 

'This guy's deadly tool is ALWAYS turned on, baby, and he nails 'em all good! It 'ain't the size of the nail that counts but how hard you can hit it!!!' - Weirdlingwolf.