Smile (2022) – Parker Finn.
1st there was the snoozy shocker It Follows, which then flaccidly begot the equally unexciting, Jumpscare-grotty Smile. I have quite severe OCD, so, annoyingly, I must endure all films to the bitter end, even if they almost immediately prove themselves to be as ruthlessly insipid as Smile! That being said, it wasn't entirely without mirthful incident, I undeniably smirked at the amusingly silly twisty-turny head bobbins, and Marilyn Manson's bravely make up free cameo at the film's glaring anti-climax engendered a modestly-sized grin! Sadly, two splendidly silly bits do not a credible horror film make. Therefore, I humbly propose that someone produces 'Rictus', a big boy horror film with ACTUAL scary bits! Granted, it's a crazy idea, but it just might work!
Like so many, no less Jump Scare-spastic contemporary horror films, Smile suffers greatly from its lacklustre text, placidly invoking all the genuine terror of a Playmobile Pirate. It genuinely saddens me that so many horror films are produced today without a vestige of originality, all under the gross misapprehension that gratuitously photorealistic gore, and dully repetitive Jump scares can miraculously compensate for a prodigious lack of narrative invention!
Such a generosity of pallid jump scares gives horror fans very little to smile about. - Semolina Spunkpuddle.
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